[Countdown Brides] Interview with Vanessa & Tobias

Today we would like to introduce you to our first countdown bride, Vanessa. We asked her a variety of questions about marriage and today we want to give you an insight into Vanessa and Tobias' planning and wedding preparations.

The two met and fell in love 9 years ago at the tender age of 18. Vanessa spontaneously approached Tobi from a group of guys in the club. Girls are the best! That made such an impression on him that he immediately searched for her on social media and found her.

This is how their story began. Tobias confessed that it should be endless when he proposed to her on their vacation together. He gave Vanessa her "never-ending story" in a homemade book with lots of photos and drawings and asked for her hand in marriage. Since then, the two have been planning their wedding, which they celebrated together with their guests in early September 2018.

Find out what it was like for Vanessa to be a bride and prepare for her wedding with her loved one. We interviewed our countdown bride exclusively two weeks before her wedding.

As a couple, you naturally think about marriage at some point. You've been happily together for such a long time, was it important to you to officially seal your relationship?

Vanessa: We had already talked about it and it was clear that we would get married one day. But the proposal came in a year when we were in a long-distance relationship for professional reasons. That's why I never thought he would ask me. We were even living in different countries at the time and that's why it never occurred to me that he could propose to me. Because it was precisely the year in the long-distance relationship that showed us how much we love each other and how important we are to each other.

Now it's time to get down to business: Wedding planning is an intensive task! Is this what you imagined it would be?

Vanessa: I have to say that I went into the whole planning process quite naively. I never imagined that you would be thinking about things in bed at night and thinking about what you have to do the next day. What can be particularly exhausting is that there are so many little things to think about. It's not enough to just choose the food. There's just so much more to it. Sometimes I was afraid that I would get lost in all the little things and lose sight of the important things. One advantage was that we had enough time to prepare with a year. But even though the wedding is very close, not everything has been sorted out regarding the wedding reception. We still have work to do, although of course there aren't many things left.

Planning a wedding like this is definitely a challenge. You've also chosen a decoration theme, and you'll certainly have to pay attention to many little details to implement it.

Vanessa: Our theme was a bit of a problem anyway, because we had planned something completely different at the beginning. The theme was supposed to be a barn wedding or vintage. With lots of wood, which is currently trendy. But 3-4 months before the wedding we changed our minds because we weren't really into it anymore. We then based our new decorations on the greenery theme or garden wedding style. Our advantage is that the location means we don't have many different service providers, but everything is offered in one package. So it was very relaxed for us and no problem to change our minds again. But I imagine that it would be more difficult for other couples to reorganize everything in such a short time.

What was your favorite inspiration for your wedding?

Vanessa: For the Greenery decoration concept, there were pictures on Instagram and Pinterest. I saw eucalyptus, especially in the form of table decorations. I then showed the pictures to my fiancé. We were both very excited about them.

Speaking of beautiful things for the wedding, how did you choose your wedding dress?

Vanessa: I bought it almost a year ago. Which, in retrospect, was a bit brave! Of course, it's always possible that you won't like the dress after six months. I admit I had those fears too. But I recently wore it again and I'm still really impressed.

Was buying your wedding dress exciting, after all, you are choosing the dress for the most beautiful day of your life?

Vanessa: We went to three shops in total with my maid of honor and the girls. And in the second shop I found what I was looking for. In the third and final shop there were lots of great vintage dresses that looked great on models. But I didn't like them so much on me. And then I realized that I couldn't get the other dress out of my head. So we went back and I bought my favorite dress.

Did you actually have that famous wedding dress moment where you just know it's the right one?

Vanessa: Yes, I definitely had that feeling! Of course it's a little different for everyone, but that's how it was for me. I had the dress on, then they put a veil on me and then the tears came. (laughs) I think that's always a good sign. I just felt good.

When we were in the first shop, I also cried when I tried on the dress for the very first time because I saw myself as a bride. But that was different.

What was your wedding date like? How did you prepare for your September wedding?

Vanessa: We would have actually liked to get married in July or August, but unfortunately everything was already booked up. It's really crazy how quickly locations get booked up! But the beginning of September was still close enough to summer for us and we're quite happy that the risk of a heatwave in late summer is no longer so high.

There is of course a small residual risk of rain, but that's why we provide umbrellas for our guests. The plan is to get married outside. As a plan B, we can move into the wedding hall. I would be lying if I said I wasn't worried about the weather. Sunshine would be nice, of course. But if it rains, we'll make the best of it.

Would you describe yourself as a typical bridezilla? With intensive wedding preparations, things can sometimes happen very quickly.

Vanessa: I've definitely had my bridezilla moments. Especially when I thought I was being consumed by all the little things. Then I can't stay calm and composed. But I'm generally well-structured and organized.

Our schedule is planned down to the last detail. Of course, that doesn't mean that it has to go exactly like that! It was just a guiding thread for our planning, so that we could see what was still missing and what still needed to be done. It was also important to us for our witnesses and bridesmaids, so that they had something to guide them. If the wedding cake isn't cut at 3 p.m. sharp, we'll still stay calm.

Does this make wedding planning easier for you?

Vanessa: A to-do list is absolutely essential. You should not only write down what needs to be done, but also when. Of course, you can only do everything step by step and not everything in one day. We actually had a kind of extra calendar for all of our appointments. I found that very helpful.

Who will particularly support you in your preparations? Do you need someone to talk to while you are planning?

Vanessa: My maid of honor is the one I call often. I go through the schedule with her and she gives me good tips. And she calms me down when she thinks I'm exaggerating. All of my bridesmaids are a big help to me. My fiancé also often visits his best man and we exchange ideas about wedding topics.

I would recommend that anyone, whether it's a mother, sister or maid of honour, share their planning thoughts with someone. It's always good, especially when you feel like you're not making any progress. It's great to not only talk about it with your fiancé, but to get a completely different perspective on things.

Wedding planning is often about choosing something. What was the most difficult thing for you to choose ?

Vanessa: I found it very difficult to decide what to eat. (laughs) Everything sounded really delicious, but of course you have to decide. I actually found that difficult.

How did you go about choosing your guests? How did you decide who to invite?

Vanessa: We invited our families, of course. Neither of us has a large family. So I found it rather difficult to set the boundaries for friends. It's not so easy to decide when you know that some people might be wondering why they aren't invited. That made it tricky at times. For most of them, it was immediately clear to us: "They're coming!" All in all, I think we managed it well.

When getting married, it's always up for discussion what name you're going to take. How is it for you?

Vanessa: It was clear from the start that I would take his name. For me, it's a tradition. Of course, I'm still an independent, self-confident woman, but it was somehow important to me. And then there's the fact that my fiancé doesn't have any siblings who can carry on the family name. So we agreed on it together.

You have to be prepared for a lot of paperwork after the wedding. Are you worried about that?

Vanessa: To be honest, I don't feel like it, but of course it's just part of it. That's why I have a few days off after the wedding to take care of it.

So you’re not going on your honeymoon right away?

Vanessa: Exactly, we didn't want that. We're going to spend our honeymoon in Tanzania! First we're going on an 8-day safari and then we're going to Zanzibar. And that requires a lot of preparation. That's why we didn't want to do them so close together so that we could concentrate better on each thing individually. The decision to go on an African safari was easy for us because we've both always wanted to go there. I think you only do something like that once in your life.

What will happen to you after the wedding?

Vanessa: Actually, after the wedding, many people ask whether we're going to have children next. The question comes up quite often. But we're not getting married so that I can get pregnant. We're not planning it that way and are deliberately taking our time. After the wedding, we're looking forward to traveling together. Next year, for example, we're going to Vietnam. It's important to us to enjoy our time together.

Do you have any final tips for brides-to-be?

Vanessa: In order to cope with the stress of wedding preparations, it is important to switch off! I often go for a walk with my fiancé and we don't talk about the wedding. We both do a lot of sport to switch off. I can only recommend that to every bride-to-be! The wedding is of course a big and wonderful event, but planning shouldn't take up your "whole life".

All of Vanessa’s beautiful wedding photos were taken by wedding photographer Nadin Dunnigan.